FEEDER/ FLORAL SHEETS
FEEDER
I've waited so long to call you mine
I've waited so long to call you mine
And I've been so afraid the longing will eat me alive
And take you with me
And take you with me
The moments I'm most happy
Are the ones I'm most afraid
My skin is red and grated
From the stubble on your face
I thought that I'd be happy,
That the pain would wash away
But its still here
And time moves so so fast from here
I picture all the bait fish
Waiting to be sold off one of one
Some things were born to be consumed
I feel the makeup on my lips
My hair undone
Some things were just born to be ruined
Some things were born to be consumed
Some things were born to be consumed
Some things were born to be consumed
Like me for you
Like me for you
Like me for you
FLORAL SHEETS
I never thought your hands would be familiar
I feel you pull me in, I smell your cologne
I remember when you were a stranger
And thinking I'd be better off alone
I remember thinking I knew better
Than to press my fragile heart against
The soft back of a man, again
Watching all my plants die,
Overwatered and rotten
Watching all my friends stand next to fires
That have long burned out
But you
Seeing my reflection in your eyes
Feeling myself wet between my thighs for you
Knowing all the times I thought I'd been in love,
I lied
Seeing my reflection in your eyes,
Feeling myself pulled like the spring tide for you
Hoping that you never change your mind
Because, I'd die
I wake up in our floral sheets
I carry bits of you with me
From all the hours we didn't sleep
From last night, and the morning
I listen for you breathing deep
I've only dreamed of love so sweet but
Now you're lying next to me
Unraveled, I'm dreaming of you
Seeing my reflection in your eyes
Feeling myself wet between my thighs for you
Hoping that you never change your mind
Because I'd miss you
Seeing my reflection in your eyes
And you should have seen the tears I cried before
Saying all the time
You're mine, you're mine, you're mine
I love you
I want to say its all for you
But I'm a little selfish too
It's all for me, it feels so good
To love you
SATURNALIA
1. INTRO
My lucks been running out for years
I think I've cried out all my tears
I wished for you, and you appeared
And now, you've shattered all my fears
I wished for you, I wished for you,
I wished for you and you appeared
2. GRIEVANCES
Mindless consumer
Late nights on the computer
I wish my skin was smoother
I wish I started sooner
Later bloomer
Do they think I'm a loser?
Can you see right through her?
You're not who I thought you were
And I don't even know why
And I don't even know why
It hurts too much, I can't cry
And I don't even know why
Still in mourning
It came without a warning
In all my dreams, I'm soaring
My job's so unrewarding
Time moves slowly
Don't follow me so closely
I'm such a fucking phony
Sometimes I feel so lonely
And I don't even know why
And I don't even know why
And I don't even know why
And I don't even know why
All these demons
They bury all these reasons in my head
Stop believing
'Cause there's always someone leaving in the end
And I'm still grieving
'Cause I can't forget the last thing that you said
So much is fading but, I'm still breathing
What is needed when everything's
Depleted, left for dead
I'll stop the bleeding
But I fear I'll never wash out all the red
Another season, another heavy season left to shed
Always deceiving and
All these grievances
3. MAGIC
All the things you said before
About all the things you loved about me
Add you to the broken list of men who once adored me
Now something in your eyes has changed
The way you say you feel about me
Can't accept this new arrangement,
I'm starting to panic
You don't look at me like I'm magic anymore
When did loving me become such an awful chore?
You don't look at me like I'm magic anymore
But you said you always would, baby, you swore
All the dreams I had for us,
And all the dreams we shared together
I remember when it felt, like I was your Queen
We sit, we talk
The spark is gone
You're cold now, and you're so withdrawn
I never thought you had it in you
To be so mean
You don't look at me like I'm magic anymore
When did loving me become such an awful chore?
You don't look at me like I'm magic anymore
But you said you always would
Baby, you swore
I held the water, it was clear and cool
(And you drained me)
(And you drained me)
I held the water, and I gave it all to you
You don't look at me like I'm magic anymore
You dont' look at me like I'm destined to be yours
You don't look at me like I'm magic anymore
And I thought you always would, baby for sure
You don't look at me like I'm magic anymore
And it all feels so different from before
And I know that I should walk away
But I'm so torn
How did all the magic I once had
Become yours?
4. PROPHECY
I used to think you were a fantasy
Instead, you were fulfillment of a prophecy
That said the world was ending and that
I was just another casualty
I used to think that we were written in the stars
The only writing is the remnants of these scars
I saw a future that I guess, was never ours
But way deep down
I knew all along
I knew all along
I knew all along
I knew all along
And I got swept into your gravity
What mistook as sacred was just strategy
I've never be so caught up in what I had thought
Was destiny
And I could always see the end from here
But I had hoped these feelings would just disappear
What started as a dark cloud in the distance
Became so clear
Pull me closer
Pull me under
Hold me down
As the dark sky fills with thunder
Watch me drown
I knew all along
I knew all along
I knew all along
I knew all along
I used to think you were a fantasy
Instead, you were fulfillment of a prophecy that says
Whatever I am chasing, always pulls away
From me
(Way deep down I always knew
I could never spend my whole life loving you
Way deep down I always knew
I could never spend my whole life loving you)
I used to think that we were written in the stars
The only writing I do now
Seems much less far
I saw a future that I guess, was never ours
But way deep down
5. TIME
Wearing your boxers
And using your toothbrush
When I forgot mine
Laying with you on the couch
Watching TV
Wasting all my time
And I felt time slip away
And I felt time slip away
Long summer nights on the inside with you
With the windows all closed tight
Dreaming of asphalt and tall grass and breezes
But I stayed with you, despite
And I felt time slip away
And I felt time slip away
6. RETURN
I've been waiting on a change
I've always felt much older than my age
And if it's for the best, it's hard to gauge
I can't control it, either way
I've been hoping it's a phase
The heartbreaks, grievances, betrayals
I know with time, that everything decays
It's all full circle, anyway
And every time you speak my name
I feel the edges burn
A moth's wing to a flame
I'm waiting on the Great Return
I've been dreaming of the stage
A place to purge my sorrow
And my rage
A place to end this long coming of age
But I'll still feel it, either way
And every time I hear my name
I fear I'll never learn
How to accept change
I'm waiting on the Great Return
And every time you speak my name
I fear I'll never learn
Who to be through all these changes
I'm waiting on the Great Return
I'm waiting on the Great Return
I'm waiting on the Great Return
I'm waiting on the Great Return
7. COAST TO COAST
I have my father's temper
And I have my mother's heart
And all this time, looking for you
Has left me in the dark
I feel my father's anger
While I cry my mother's tears
The porous dreams I've held for you
Have held me back for years
I've shattered all my selfish dreams
To find a dream in you
But you can't do the same for me
I guess I always knew
Was my attachment to you
A distraction from myself?
My fragile heart still tells me
I don't want anybody else
And all those magic moments
Just a pathway to the end
I try to wrap my head around
Never seeing you again
The lights have all come up now
And the end is coming soon
I'll walk home with my shoes off
Under Saturn's looming moons
Alone at last, inevitably
I sit and write this song (again)
It suddenly occurs to me
This might be what I wanted all along
And in the sudden silence
I've found one thing to be true
Deep down
The only reason I was ever drawn to you is
I wanted to be alone
Alone
Alone
(I strayed so long, just to find out you were wrong
I stayed so long, just to find out you were wrong)
And I run when hearts are open
Only want it if it's broken
Alone
(And all I ever wanted was to be alone)
And I run when hearts are open
Only want it if it's broken
Alone
(And all I ever wanted was to be alone)
And I run when hearts are open
Only want it if it's broken
Alone
And all I ever wanted was to be alone
And I run when hearts are open
Only want it if it's broken
Alone
And I run when hearts are open
Only want it if it's broken
Alone
(And all I ever wanted was to be alone)
And I run when hearts are open
Only want it if it's broken
Alone
And all I ever wanted was to be alone
Alone
8. 10:24
Lights out on a downtown street
I can't imagine
(Can you see the stars?)
I had a dream last night
Of the way it used to be
Asking all the trees
What happened to your sisters?
The ghosts inside the breezes
Can you hear them whisper
I've been here before
I've been here before
And all that we can see
Is far from the full picture
The blood-soaked enemies
Divided by some fissure
And all these glaring screens
The path of least resistance
Unyielding war machines
That threaten our existence
But I've been here before
I've been here before
(It's dark when I close my eyes,
I can imagine)
I've been here before
I've been here before
(And I'm free, so free)
I've been here before
I've been here before
I've been here before
I've been here before
Asking all the trees
What happened to your sisters?
When I have dreams like these
I know deep down, I miss you
And if I listen closely
I can hear you whisper
That all that happens here
Will happen down the river
But I've been here before
Through this revolving door
Grief stricken on the floor
All that is broken is restored
All that is broken is restored
All that is broken is restored
All that is broken is restored
All that is broken is restored